Monday, 19 June 2017

Conscious. . .

I'm just being conscious . . . 

I can't stop talking to myself
I keep on looking in the mirror
Something is different about me these days
Or maybe I just woke up
I know I'm breaking through my shell
Because everything is getting clearer
A little light can make a lot of change
Or maybe I just spoke up
Or maybe I'm just finally

To be conscious is to be fully present in the moment you are in, being able to take in all of your surroundings, taking notice of every detail, as much of it as you can absorb with all of your sense combined.  We become too easily distracted these days.  Technology steals our attention when we are with friends because we feel compelled to keep checking what is being said or posted in virtual spaces rather than enjoying deeper connections that can be found in physically, close proximity spaces.  It isn't lost on me either that you're reading this online somewhere in the world - either on a train or a bus somewhere in Europe or in North America, or maybe in an internet cafe somewhere while you're busy browsing other things that take your interest.  Have you broken out of your shell lately?  Sometimes we forget that when we look in the mirror we forget to use it as a tool to be critically self reflective and confront some home truths about ourselves. It is something I constantly think about.

Conscious
Haven't gone crazy I promise
I'm just high up from that honest
Open my mouth 'cos I feel
(Feel, feel, feel)
Conscious
You might say I'm out of pocket
But I got so tired from boxes
Watch me as I keep it real
(Real, real, real)

What type of people do you find yourself surrounded by?  I find it increasingly difficult to be able to hide what I really think these days, and I don't I need to apologise for that anymore.  I think it has a lot to do with not living up to people's assumptions about how I am supposed to be in the world.  I never meet anyone's assumptions.  +Kevin Honeycutt said to me once that I would surprise people - that when I open my mouth, I do not sound like what I look like.  That was something I haven't forgotten since those words came out of his mouth almost five years ago.  It helped give me insight into what some people might think about me.  What state of consciousness do you have?  When you go to open your mouth - do you say things that you are feeling?  People around are becoming more honest about who they are and how they are feeling.  Some of them apologise for their honesty, but I tell them that it's important for them to acknowledge and speak their truth.



There's a new rhythm in my walk
I'm taking every step on purpose
And I see people start to notice
But maybe I just don't care
I know that some will say that I'm lost
I'm eating apples from the serpent
Does my awareness make you nervous?
I'm thankful I'm not still there
I'm thankful that I'm now finally

You can minimise silly mistakes in your life, if you are conscious of every step that you make, that you live not only with purpose and intention, but that each step has purpose and intention.  It is of course, important to have some down time as often as you can to balance the seriousness of a life that you will dedicate to being the best version of yourself.  Whether you need the validation of others to spur you on as motivation, if you need people's approval to allow you to move towards bigger goals - that's totally fine and natural.  I think once you get to a state of consciousness when if your life mission is able to withstand people's perceptions, and escape the scrutiny of critics who could never possibly understand what you are about, why you know what you know.  If you're eating apples from the serpent, you're probably the type of person who is willing to try anything once - to me, this is just one way of getting an informed opinion.  Sometimes being more aware than others in a confined space, doesn't mean that you have limit yourself either.  That I think is probably the most fascinating part of being conscious.  That you don't need to travel far physically to be somewhere completely foreign.  You can just go there in your mind.

Conscious
Haven't gone crazy I promise
I'm just high up from that honest
Open my mouth 'cos I feel
(Feel, feel, feel)
Conscious
You might say I'm out of pocket
But I got so tired of boxes
Watch me as I keep it real
(Real, real, real)

When you are out of pocket, it could be because people ask for so much so you give it away.
When you give so much of yourself away, does this then mean there is room in your pocket for you to put your hands in there while you walk around with those meaningful, purposeful steps?  Even when sad, tragic or hard times come calling, I understand that I meant to experience those things because the mirror I am holding up to myself is telling me that opportunities for growth are present.  If I could count the number of boxes people have tried to put me in there, and I have stepped out and crushed each time - I could start a recycling plant.  I'm like that annoying jack in a box that has a loose latch, so keeps popping out all the time, so hard to keep in a box.  Keeping it real could mean that not only do you not fit into a box, but there is so much about you that people can't quite pin down, so they almost try to chop you up into as many boxes, attempting to break the pieces of you, not knowing you've adapted to knowing yourself in every shape possible.

While you spend time chasing collections
I'll chase a deeper connection
To love more
Live more
Be more

I hope that even when we're done spending time chasing our public collections, conforming to what society would have us do - to be seen to be normal and contributing to the machine that is the rat race of life, that we have a chance to gain deeper connections with others.  I have found that those in the past who I have been connected with, have stumbled in their journeys and lost their way.  When we come to reconnect, they have little understanding about who they are anymore as they've been too busy looking out the window at people living their lives and being their best selves.  I hope that you all love more, live more and be more.  I think once we start to own our thoughts and own our feelings, we can all start to be a little conscious. . .